Lettuce not Forget
April 30th, 2009 by Grandpa OddballCopyright © GetOddNews and Grandpa Oddball April 30, 2009. All rights reserved.
Eventually we had some success with green beans and potatoes. While small, the potatoes were delicious and at one potato per bite they were reasonably easy to prepare (unlike the corn). “New potatoes” my wife, an old farm girl, called them. The green beans may have been a little tasteless but we were able to grow plenty but by far our greatest success was with lettuce!
Yes, lettuce. It grew like weeds. We didn’t even have to tend it. We had lettuce coming out our ears. Every meal featured another lettuce recipe. It grew so profusely that we started bragging about it and giving it away (before it overwhelmed us).
At first, the lettuce was our pride and joy. We were successful gardeners but then… well, it wouldn’t stop growing. I had dreams at night of this lettuce head army marching towards and over us begging “eat me, eat me”! We gave it away to friends, relatives and even begged strangers to take some. It was no use, the army marched on.
Once some of my cousins visited us, we couldn’t help bragging about our bountiful and delicious lettuce. After being dutifully impressed we went on to discuss other things which resulted in a spontaneous picnic when one of my cousins casually mentioned he had some fresh butchered hamburger meat. Full of enthusiasm we loaded up our vehicles and went to a wildness campsite where we proceeded to barbecue some nice juicy patties.
Carefully preparing a huge bowl of our wonderful garden lettuce for the burgers we all set forth in anticipation. Ah, it was a wonderful day. The sun was shining, the barbecue smelled great and then it was time to eat. Carefully preparing the buns I noticed something was amiss. Slowly the awful realization struck.
I’d forgotten the lettuce!!!!!!!!!!
It was still back at our place on the counter. To this day I’m reminded of that ignominy.
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