Posts Tagged ‘Humor’
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I have GOD (Grandpa Oddball Disease). Its symptoms include delusions, mental scarring and even permanent death (much worse than temporary death!).
WHO CAN I SUE?????????
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"That flight's been canceled."
"What do you mean canceled? The information monitor lists it as on schedule," I was not happy. A long and difficult work week away from home and family had finally ended with this fresh obstacle facing us. I was unhappy but my business colleague was steamed! Faced with imperious indifference he blew his top as he not too gently informed the airline employee that his response was not acceptable.
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Have you ever tasted baby food? When our daughter was a baby I tried it and no wonder babies are fussy!
Why, I wondered, did baby food taste so ... uh, bad, let's say. (more...)
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"Do you have any books on UNIX?" I asked the reference librarian at one of our local libraries some years ago (before I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis). The man seemed taken aback and a bit nervous. He looked at me strangely like I was some weirdo that had just wandered off the street and was going to attack him.
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Why do women have this unreasoning stereotype concerning men? Whenever they get together and start snickering and gesturing punctuated by sharp barks of laughter followed by all them glancing knowingly your way then you know they're discussing TV remote control usage or messy diapers or some such topic that illustrate men's deficiencies. I think this is grossly unfair. It's particularly unfair since we try our best to help out by relieving them of some of their burdensome household chores.
Take children and diapers for example. (more...)
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Yes, life did go on beyond the grade - the Lewiston grade that is. At the time I wasn't so sure. It was early in our married life and we'd recently moved to Northern Idaho and believe me that was a cultural shock for a city boy like me. Communication didn't always proceed smoothly despite the illusion of a common language. My wife on the other hand being an old Minnesota farm girl fit in like a custom glove except in one particular. She never got used to driving mountain roads. Fortunately, or so I thought, for some reason I had no such trouble. In fact, I rather enjoyed the challenge.
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Concentrating furiously on my therapy trying to recover after better than four years in hospitals and nursing homes I had no idea what was coming. The therapy was hard (for me) and I wasn't paying as much attention to my surroundings as I should have or I would have noticed the conversation ensuing between my wife and one of the therapists nearby. My first inkling to the unfolding drama was when I heard the words South Dakota and puddle drift my way. Glancing over I encountered THE LOOK (you happily married husbands know what that means) and it was then I knew what was coming.
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Yup, that's what the sign said as Grandma Oddball drove by one of our local car dealerships. Almost as amusing was their reaction when Grandma Oddball called to inquire how much their used pus cost. After some confusion the phone went silent except for the voice of the receptionist fading away, "Oh dear, .....". An hour later when Grandma Oddball drove by the sign has been removed!
This is just one of many odd juxtapositions that we find amusing. Take the Vineyard Church near where we live.
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And it was a extraordinary feeling. My children looked up to me, admired me and believed with all their heart everything I said. I was immortal and knew everything. I vividly remember the time when my daughter asked, "What was Lincoln like?" Such trust!
Then it all seemed to go bad. ... learn how »
